Famlia (r) History
Abuela told me stories of stories
in thick accented English
about ancestral oral prophets
explaining the one two–
step of Aztec blood rumor.
Native American familial lines
somehow delineated
along the Rio Grande’s true,
but imaginary boundary.
Forced into place by colony,
by imperial force,
into the maw of history books
that are no longer produced.
Our histories–the same
and we could hear it from each others
mouths, if we knew what it was to listen.
Abuela told stories of dead grandfathers
who whispered to their gardens
in language the plants only know. The old men,
speaking that now muscle reflex foreign tongue. And
turning the face of the flowers like the sun.
I’ve crossed the river line between America and Mexico.
Between ancestral land and ancestral land. Between
one story line and another. Stories
which collided turning the earth red
with our collective iron.
And each tale mumbling
across the rumble of the Earth.
Abuela told me these things–that once
a story could tell me how to be
who we were. And that story could
nestle me into the long line
of our struggles
that only waits for listeners.
These voices echo en mis suenos
repeating messages I can’t recall when I wake.
I dare say the story of my life is yours.
Given by hands once touched by soil,
whispering to me of another world,
not flashed in nostalgia, but in fact
of its once being. The fact that
our ancestors fought on all sides
of all wars. In the simplicity
of wanting them
to stop.
In that simplicity
of the Earth
baring all
our known lives.
Abuela taught me to tell
you, that the story of life runs
like the Earth’s crust faulted
into place. That speakers should be storytellers
who’ve not forget their turn to speak
their turns
to listen.
My story–a world of splintered families
with insignia’s emblazed on the left of their chests—a raised
fist-a fist holding a camera, a pen, a carrot. Uncountable flags
–rainbow–red pink–red
black– red gold– ever known emblem
meant
as a rallying cry.
How my family didn’t tell you.
That there is silence in the din of raised
voices, that the voices raised
when they listened.
How every line
of conversation can’t lead back to someone
etched with a same symbol.
How that was how your people died.
Also from the knife, the spear, the bullet and bomb. We died under eachothers
hands in the sun. We died against walls, backs against oceans. In the midst of one
revolution or the next.
Uncles and fathers, Abuela’s and sisters,
saints
of many people
the freedom fighters
of many people
muddied the river banks with blood
and filled them with tears. We died daring to believe
that we could overcome this. This enemy creating frozen histories into facts. History
given to erase story.
My grandmothers and grandfathers all dead. Their lives not. Their legacies not,
their stories not. Let me tell you,
that all they wanted was food for me, shelter for me
and the respect we all deserve. And let me tell you
they dared the same for you.
And I take that, and give you this,
my arms locked around yours. A night
where all friends sat around me. The police,
with their spotlights emblazing us as their enemies.
Speaking Spanish I told my family that we were
all together, that we were all lovers, and that there was
nothing that was fear. That short lived world
torn down in the glow of their fluorescents.
I have the blood of my mothers and fathers in me, the iron of the earth
in my veins. And all it is to live I have learned from you, all it is to live
we can teach each other. That past that drove my people into other people,
that drove your life into mine has passed. And whatever it is to heal
must come, but tomorrow can’t be today. Tomorrow can’t be now.
I dare to believe in you. As my ancestors believe in me, as their
countless hands cup my life with theirs. I am not here alone.
I am never alone, and neither are you.
We shared our lives in the momentary sun of Liberty
our friends bled into concrete.
My Abuela never saw New York. She would tell me
that cities where places where families
fell apart. Where one persons
possessions became the place
where their hearts died. She’d
say to remember, that family
is where all truth lies. Where love
resides, that no prison cell, no
bullet, or blade. No baton
can take your story from you.
But that you must always
take the time to give it. That
you must always take the time
to hears someone’s life
come from their words
and imbed itself in you.
And as your language
changes, as the world changes through
the meeting of so many stories, and tales,
the myths of our past, as they all meet
and embrace in the moments given to
another we can learn what it is for a family to survive.
We can learn what it is to be family.